In the world there are three kinds of love. Even though we call them all “love” they are different in motive. The first kind of love comes with an “If”, it is conditional. If we meet certain expectations we receive “If” type of love. For instance: If you are a good boy/girl your teacher will love you. As my spouse, if you meet my expectations I will love you. If you are successful I will love you, etc. This kind of love sets pre-conditions in order to give love in return. It is a give-and-take type of love. Love is given only if certain conditions are met; therefore, this is a selfish, egotistical kind of love. The marriages built upon “If” kind of love are short-lived as it is hard to keep up with the expectations or whims of the other party. It is laden with stress; when the expectations of the other party are not met the disappointment sets in and the love turns sour. [Read more…] about Three kinds of LOVE
Goal setting for 2015
Unlike every year, this year I set no goals; have no list of New Year’s resolutions. Like most of us, I used set goals, have my new year’s resolutions just before the New Year and grand picture of what to achieve in the coming year. Write or update my goals / to do list to add new ones.
Even if I hadn’t had a new list, at least I had a soul search and have a few things in mind to incorporate in my personal and business life. Every new year’s eve or during this process I used to get sad for unachieved goals, the reasons which held me back etc. Also a year means I was getting older.
I read numerous articles, tried many different techniques, paper and software over the years and still do. The best time management philosophy so far is the TMI (Time Manager International). It suits my personality to break things down to smaller action items using the pine tree philosophy. Trunks (the trunk is you and the overall goals you have set yourself for your private and professional life), Branches (the branches are key areas – the main areas on which to concentrate your efforts in order to reach your goals), Twigs (the twigs are major tasks to be performed within each key area) and Pine Needles (the pine needles are all the practical activities and details that are necessary to complete each of your major tasks). [Read more…] about Goal setting for 2015
When nobody believes in you!
It usually starts with the ones close to you. Your wife/husband, sister, brother, mother, father and close friend etc. They start to hint things. You may have several attempts at certain projects, small or large with some success or no success. One by one they will start advising rather than seeking advice, without your asking. All of a sudden they become the authority in all your initiatives; even for the ones you are well qualified for.
You start to feel failed, small and suspect your own ability. This game goes on for a while until you think you are useless, a total disaster and question your life from a negative perspective. If you are in a long period of soul searching, you had it big time. They may even influence your children if you have any and cause them to lose their respect for you or look at you with pity. [Read more…] about When nobody believes in you!
Time to take writing seriously
I have been writing for a few years as and when I like at www.alemdag.org . My interest areas are mainly technology, martial arts and personal development. I can’t ignore travel, Turkish culture and history either.
Writing was just a hobby to keep my few articles in one place. My few articles has been published in Yerelce and Light Millennium where I also have a seat on BOD (Board of Directors). Bircan Unver, President and Chair of LM and Nusret Ozgul, owner of Yerelce both encouraged me to write more. Thank you to both of them. [Read more…] about Time to take writing seriously
A Branch To Cling On… We all need it.
“It hurts to see someone you love, value, admire, give importance and make a close intimate connection with crumble and diminish under the falsehood.”
“We never know when our lives will turn upside down, although sometimes the down side may be better than the upside.”
“The universe is not a mere coincidence. It has its laws in much precise manner. What we put out in deed and thought has consequences and eventually it will catch up with us. “
*****
Sometimes I stand on a roadside, sit in a main road coffee shop and just indulge in watching people. Everybody seems to rush for something to somewhere. When I abstract myself from the environment and just watch from a distance, it seems life flows before me.
We live in a fast moving world or it seems like that. Success seems to like speed. Changes brought by the technology fuels the changes in every aspect of our lives. Not only living standards, ethics, values and many other good deeds change for better, some degenerate. [Read more…] about A Branch To Cling On… We all need it.
The Unsettling Soul – Life is just a breath.
“Hope alone always has a downside. Hope does not have certainty. It has doubt embedded in it.”
Some of us are sensitive; our souls are on the edge of this material world and on the spiritual (other). We cross the lines here and then, we feel deep and our soul hurts when things are not what they are supposed to be.
How much of a control do we have in our lives? Do we know our purpose or do we really have one?
I believe that we have fair amount of control. We are created with all the necessary faculties and needed tools to explore our full potential as a human being. [Read more…] about The Unsettling Soul – Life is just a breath.